Leadership is about creating a space where people can grow. And growth is development, not growth in the business sense. By space, I do not only mean physical space, which is undoubtedly important, but above all spiritual space. It makes no difference whether a person’s main tool is their body (e.g. working with their hands) or their brain (e.g. office work).
Just as a child can’t develop if it doesn’t have a safe space, the same is true for an adult. Like a child, a person grows up (!), but whether he or she develops is another question.
A few months ago, I gave a lecture at university (still on management). I went to the lecture room early and put on some music. One of the first comments I received from students was their hope that maybe there would be funky jazz at the beginning of every lecture.
A few days later, I received feedback from a mutual acquaintance in the circle, where he had come to talk to a student about a lecture, after which he was said to have floated home fascinated by the nature of leadership. The lecture lasted 3 hours and the student was fascinated by the topics because he felt expected 2 minutes before the lecture started.
The creation of a spiritual space also includes the authenticity of the leader to be him/herself. Maybe to create a safe environment to talk about everything that matters in life and that I dream about, that I fear. Not just professionally, but more broadly – it builds the trust to be trusted.
Space management consists of creating, maintaining and growing space. What is the mental space you have in your team? You’ve probably noticed that in some company (spiritual space) you start to behave differently, open up differently, feel differently. Despite the fact that you may not be able to describe the mental space you have at work in one context or another (your team, the organisation at large, your desk mate), you will recognise that it is a little different from any other mental space.
If something is disturbing you, or if you feel stiff, uncomfortable, what should you change to create the right mental environment? What can you do? It’s not about how others should behave differently, it’s about how you felt you needed to. You can now be the one to stand up for what you need. If the feeling was extremely unpleasant, it might be a good time to think about whether you really need to be in that room.
Holding space means being there for another person, both mentally and physically. As a listener, we can enable talking. To listen, to be there, without thinking about how I’m going to answer him or what I’m going to ask him next or how I’m going to solve his problem or how I felt when I did. People don’t always want solutions (especially someone else’s), they want to talk it out first. Unless help is asked for, don’t go to the rescue or take control of things.
Listen not just with your ears, but with your heart. In our everyday lives, we listen deeply as rarely as we breathe in deeply and especially exhale deeply. Let’s let the other one take a deep breath in our words.
Creating and preserving space!
