The article was published on Personaliuudised.ee and Juhi5’s blog.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs ends in most textbooks with a level of self-fulfilment. Shortly before his death, Maslow added a self-transcendence, or a level of what might be called transpersonal.
Since Maslow died a year later, and the supplement was published in a little-known journal, and traditional psychology tends not to tolerate transpersonal psychology, the fact has been left out of many treatments. This is how most of today’s generations of managers and HR professionals working in organisational psychology have grown up.
As the readers here are mainly from a human resources background, i.e. an in-house soothsayer, the strange inner compassion of colleagues will have caught the ears of many through deeper conversations. People talk about how things seem fine on the surface, but the dissatisfaction inside stings. Such inexplicable dissatisfaction overwhelms all of us from time to time, and it is to the organisational gatekeepers – managers and human resources staff – that we turn at those moments when it already hurts enough. There are many difficult moments in a person’s life, but the most well known are the mid-life crisis and the existential crisis of the under-35s.
I would argue that people-centred management is a thing of the past. Man-centredness puts the human being first, with his body, mind (ego) and soul. But working on these three interactions is only half of our life, the rest of our life is spent on self-deliverance and the transhuman levels that Maslow described before his death.
An increasing number of people have been forced to look inward in recent years, as entertainment (detaching the mind from the self) has become more limited, and we have not had the opportunity to escape from ourselves to a warm country, a nightclub, an event, where instead of looking inward we can look at the lives of others.
People are afraid to be alone with themselves because fears, doubts, guilt, painful experiences, inner and outer demons start to surface. But without seeing them, without accepting them, we cannot move forward and we cannot improve the quality of ourselves. But the development of an organisation is based on the development of its people. When people are stuck, the organisation stays stuck.
To grow to great heights as a person, an organisation or a tree, for example, the roots must be deep in the ground. Only this will ensure resilience and that we do not topple over in stormy winds because of the shallowness of our roots.
Often, as a trainer, I see that the higher the position, the more out of touch the leader seems to be with themselves, with their true depth. Maybe that’s why he’s moved up the career ladder, because he’s buried the self-absorption under the hard work and that’s why he’s stood out with his results? But when at some point you start to lead others, there comes a deep need to deal with yourself, so as not to do more harm than good to others.
Engaging deeply with oneself means dealing with one’s own unconscious unconscious processes, becoming aware of one’s own meaning and footprint on the world, in dialogue with oneself, with one’s own deeper values and layers, deeper than the superficial level where achievements, the judgement of others, external image and success, and the various rituals of being accepted in a corporate religion matter.
Dealing with depth is not an esoteric yammering about the past. It is understanding and above all accepting the circumstances that shape our automatic reactions and decisions. Peace comes in acceptance, not yet at the level of understanding. The answers to the questions of who I am, how I feel and what that feeling is trying to tell me may pop into our consciousness from time to time, but we bury it conveniently in everyday activities.
Ilse Sand has outlined the four levels of conversation. Perhaps this approach as a leader and as a human resources partner will help you to look into the deeper layers within yourself and then be a support to others. To look into the depths of discovering your true self and the passion that drives you to add value to the world and to your organisation. After all, we want to be with and work with people who can help us to realise our deepest dreams and thereby build commitment. These 4 levels of depth of conversation are:
- A convivial, superficial conversation where topics are constantly changing.
- The level of interest or role-playing where people have a common interest and share views and information. Decisions are taken and consensus is reached. It’s more about roles.
- A personal level, where feelings and experiences are discussed. Allowed to enter their personal sphere and look into their personal life experiences. It is understood that the inner world is not so different from the others.
- A deep level of direct connection, where feelings and perceptions of each other (including yourself!) are discussed. A deeper meaning is created. We very rarely reach this level, but these situations stay with us and make our lives come alive.
