Time and time again I see situations where people go to comfort someone who is crying, pat them on the head, etc., or completely panic and look for a way to end the conversation quickly.
The crying and the not crying are both involved in this frantic behaviour.
Emotions are like energy charges in our bodies.
We know from school physics that if a voltage is left ungrounded, a short circuit occurs.
In the workplace, this short circuit is often referred to as burnout.
But why are we afraid and afraid of another person’s strong emotions?
People’s emotions are particularly difficult for a leader who is committed to keeping people happy.
Perhaps taking responsibility for another person’s emotions on themselves.
The same applies at home.
Whether it’s in the relationship with parents (you don’t want to be honest with your mother as an adult because you don’t want to hurt her) or with your companions, who you have also taken it upon yourself to make happy.
We feel awkward, uncomfortable, want to run away, sometimes blame ourselves, want to quickly find out why we are crying, rationalise it away, and other methods of suppression.
In order to relieve this discomfort within ourselves, we quickly start either physically patting ourselves on the shoulder to comfort or to tell: “Don’t cry!”, “Be positive!”, “It’s OK, everything will be OK”, etc.
The same mechanism works for the hooker herself.
He feels embarrassed, uncomfortable, guilty, wants to run away and suppresses the cry.
But let’s forget that emotion is a perfectly normal and human part of us.
But what do you do when someone starts crying?
Let cry, let be! Where appropriate, encourage the use of words to express emotion.
When the crying stops, ask how does it feel now and what does the person need?
And then just listen, accept their journey.
Sadness is the same emotion as joy.
Just as we don’t suppress joy, we shouldn’t do the same with sadness.
If these situations are uncomfortable for you, one must deal with the sorrow within oneself (sometimes also with anger). This often requires the support of a therapist or the support of someone else who has worked through these emotions within himself and is able to be neutral there next door. If you need one of these, as a therapist and mentor, of course, I’m there for you!
